Propinquity
by safeasthesea
Summary: Set somewhere after Season 5 in a happier land. 5x15 does not happen in the same way it does for the Kings. AU-ish in which we meet Will's sister and a different side of Will, Will and Alicia work on getting their middle, and my whole TV life isn't torn apart. I started writing this before Christmas so it deviates from episodes after that.
1. you're a red string

_This is my first published FF so please review. I already have the next two or three chapters written so if you want more, let me know._

_I own nothing except for my ideas and my refusal to believe certain things have happened. I especially don't own the characters or story or the Civil Wars lyrics._

_/_

William Gardner was not unfamiliar with the sensation of waking up with a strange girl in his bed, so when he rolled over and saw a mess of curls sprawled across the pillow; it took his mind a second to recall that this was not just any girl.

Then, she woke up too, turning toward him. It was like looking in a mirror. She had the same October brown eyes, flecks of bronze with the sunlight flickering slowly in them. She had the same desert sand hair. She had the same propensity to ask too many questions.

"Morning Uncle Will," she said sweetly, the sleep still in her voice.

"Good morning, Sweet Bea, how'd you get in here?"

She giggled at the sound of her pet name. "Uncle Willlllllll. I'm four years old now! You can't call me that anymore." She had inherited his stubborn nature as well.

"Sorry, BEATRICE—what are you doing here?"

"Mommy went to get coffee or something and she told me to stay here with you until she got back or until you woke up but you looked like you were having a good dream and Mommy says to only wake people up when they're having a bad dream so I just stayed right next to you and thought about ponies for a while and then I fell back asleep and then you woke up and then I woke up and that's it," the little girl stated without missing a beat.

To be honest, he was having a good dream. They were always good dreams when he woke up still feeling the coarseness of her raven hair in his fingers and he could still hear the breathy way she said his name when they were alone.

Of course, he couldn't explain that to a preschooler. Instead he told her, "I was dreaming of all the fun things we were going to do together today. I have the whole day off. It's a special Beatrice/Uncle Will day."

Maybe family was what he needed. Maybe it would help him stop seeing her at stoplights and in the wine aisle at the grocery store. Maybe it would stop the tightening he felt in his chest when he smelled her perfume on a stranger walking by him on the street. He could only hope at this point.

/

Sophie Gardner was not a morning person.

She also was not the type of person to get dumped by her husband and move in (however temporary it may be) with her brother with her four year old. That happened. Sometimes, things change.

Standing in line at the Starbucks she found wandering the neighborhood around her brother's apartment, her mind was elsewhere when she realized she was next in line. As she placed her order, she heard the barista call out an order for 'Alicia.' The name rang oddly in her head. She'd heard it plenty of times…on the phone with her brother.

Lacking some of the subtlety and tact her mother wished she would have, she called out, "Alicia? Alicia Florrick?"

The woman turned cautiously around, her dark eyes ablaze.

"I'm Sophie, S-Sophie Gardner. You used to…work with my brother."

"Oh, of course," Alicia says with a synchronized sigh of relief and hesitation. "I've seen pictures of you and your daughter, I believe."

"I'm sure you have. Will loves his niece more than anything."

"Well…" Alicia looks at her watch. "I have a thing to get to. It was nice to meet you, finally."

"You too! I've heard so much about you! Take care."

The dark haired woman turned on her heel and walked out of the coffee shop, leaving Sophie to gather what she could recollect about this woman; the woman who had, in a matter of months, put her brother together and tore him apart; the woman she had told her brother didn't deserve him. Now, she wasn't sure that was true. Now, she had been in Alicia's place, willing to do whatever she could to save her marriage, to save her family.

Vaguely, she heard someone calling her name. She grabbed her coffees with a brisk 'thank you' and walked out into the blinding spring sun.

On her way home, she thought about everything that had transpired over the past month. Life changes so fast and you are never ready for the curveball, especially when you're not even up to bat. It hits you when you're in the outfield, picking daisies to put in your hair, not paying attention to the game. If she had been paying attention, maybe she would have seen this coming. She hadn't expected it when she came home one Tuesday from the studio and saw half her furniture missing. She wasn't expecting divorce papers to be sitting on the kitchen table. This was the same table where they made love the first time, and, coincidentally, the last time.

It was all moving too fast.

Legal proceedings and property divisions and custody arrangements and child support payments bounded around her head. How could it go sour so fast? Since when was the man she loved, the man sitting on the opposite side of the courtroom? She started to understand how Will felt when Alicia chose another man, another life over him.

Despite all this, she still did love him. She still thought he was a good guy. He was still Bea's dad. He was the man she'd spent six years of Saturdays making pancakes with. He was the man who proposed to her at the top of a rollercoaster. Now came the drop.

/

By the time Sophie got back to Will's apartment, he had dressed Bea in head to toe White Sox gear. He had even tried to pull her hair into a ponytail at the top of her head and truthfully, he hadn't done such a terrible job.

He didn't notice his sister staring at him while he tucked a few of Bea's stray hairs away from her face. "You'd make a good dad," Sophie said quietly.

Will chuckled. He'd only ever thought of having kids with Alicia. He imagined them with her dark curls and his eyes, her creamy skin and his long legs. He imagined playing catch in the yard. He imagined Zach and Grace as big brother and big sister. No matter how he tried, he couldn't picture anyone else in Alicia's place in the fairy tale but that was a distant dream now.

"Mommy! Guess where we're going today!" Bea ran to her mother and grabbed her pinky. "Uncle Will is taking me to a baseball game AND he's going to let me eat hot dogs."

Sophie smiled, letting her daughter's joy be her joy for a moment. "Wow, baby, that sounds like a lot of fun! Can I tag along or is this just for you guys?"

"You can come, Mom, but you can't be in charge. Uncle Will is in charge."

Will stated, in his usual stoic tone, "I got three tickets, of course you're invited."

"And I got coffee…remind me to tell you about that later." Sophie set the coffees down on the kitchen counter and went into the guestroom to change into appropriate baseball attire.

When she emerged, Bea was waiting not-so-patiently by the door. _"Let's go, let's go, let's go,"_ she sang.

Will was determined to make this a good day for everyone. He knew Sophie needed a day to clear her mind and let go and he knew it wouldn't hurt him either.

As they left his apartment, Bea wiggled her way between them, holding both of their hands. Will led them down the street to the L stop. They were not native Chicagoans and this was something you had to do in Chicago.

Approaching the stadium, Will saw a large crowd gathering and he scooped Bea up and placed her on his shoulders, feeling her tiny fingers curl around his collar. It was a perfect spring day, a perfect day for baseball. The sun was warm on their skin and the 'Windy City' was more like the 'Breezy City" that day.

The gates opened, they handed their tickets to the usher, and went to find their seats. The game moved slowly and after a hotdog and popcorn, Bea had fallen asleep in her uncle's lap. He tried his best not to wake her as the White Sox hit the game winning run.

Once the game was done, Will continued to carry Bea as Sophie carried their souvenir hats and shirts and gloves. Miraculously, they made it back to his apartment without waking the child.

/

Sophie laid Bea in the guestroom bed, delicately removing some of her game day gear. She met Will back in the living room. He was sitting on the dark leather couch, beer in hand, eyes closed. There was another beer sitting on the coffee table and Sophie picked it up smoothly as she sat next to her brother on the couch.

"So…do you want to talk about it?" He asked, knowing that she didn't.

"What's there to talk about? I'm getting divorced. That's it. Nothing I can do to change it," Sophie sighed into her beer. "Do you want to talk about Alicia?"

Will's expression turned sour.

"I met her."

"You what?"

"I met her, today, at the coffee shop."

"How did she look…I mean, how did you know it was her?" He said, catching himself.

"Well the barista called her name…and I saw a Florrick/Agos letterhead sticking out of her briefcase."

"And then?"

"I talked to her."

Will's face then filled with anger. "Why the hell would you do that?"

"I had to meet the girl who broke your heart. I wanted to see if I needed to kick her ass…but she kind of looked like she could kick mine so I just introduced myself, we talked for approximately 30 seconds and she rushed out."

"I can't believe you." Will moved away from his sister, hoping the distance would help him hide his emotion.

"SORRY." Sophie wasn't really sorry but she didn't know what else to say and she couldn't take having another person mad at her.

They sat together, but separate on the couch for what seemed like an eternity. Both of their minds were somewhere else.

For Sophie, she thought about how she'd explain to Beatrice why Mommy and Daddy didn't live together anymore and why the little girl had to travel back and forth between Baltimore and Chicago. Then she wondered if she'd even stay in Chicago. She knew she couldn't go back to Baltimore. They had too many memories there. Maybe she'd go to Mexico. Thank God, they never went there. Her mind then went back to the courtroom when the judge was determining their custody arrangements. She felt her chest tighten as she recalled her ex-husband's apathy towards visitation. He had always been such an involved father. He went to Bea's preschool Daddy-Daughter dance. He took Bea to karate. They had a standing Thursday evening ice cream date. How could someone change so fast? He didn't even put up a fight when the judge awarded Sophie with primary custody and him with Holiday and summer visitations. She felt the tears burn her eyelids and she took a long swallow of beer.

Will, on the other hand, worked to get the image that was tattooed on his eyelids out. It had been there for two years now, since she ended things. The picture was cemented a little more every time he saw her in court, especially the time with the white suit. That was the final nail in the coffin. He didn't know if he would ever get her out of his mind. He tried. Boy, did he try for twenty years. He tried with Isabel, Tammy, even Celeste. He tried with work. He tried with running. That's all it ever was though, a solid attempt. He went out swinging each at bat.

Their solemn silence was disrupted when Sophie's phone pinged with a text message. Groaning, she picked it up. The text came from a friend in the music business who knew she was in Chicago. It read, "There are two tickets with your name on them at the Vic tonight for the Civil Wars. Would love to see you!"

Looking up at Will, Sophie asked slyly, "Know any good babysitters? We're going out tonight!"

/

Sophie rifled through her suitcases for the perfect little black dress. She finally found it crumpled in the corner of the last of her 3 bags. 'Good enough,' she thought to herself, shaking it out. She hadn't worn the dress since before Bea. She had always measured time like that; before Bea, after Bea, before college, after college. Now she had another defining point on the timeline of her life: before the divorce and after. She felt anger seethe. It rose from her toes and radiated out with such a force that she decided against the 'fuck-me-pumps' she intended to wear and instead grabbed her combat boots.

She met Will in the living room. He was wearing dark grey pants and a blue shirt. He looked too much like their father, Sophie thought.

"Nice…shoes," He said bluntly.

Ignoring him, Sophie remarked, "Thank god you have those teenage neighbors. They're like built in babysitters with their convenient location."

"I didn't know I did," Will quipped.

It was after 8 and Sophie had tucked Bea into bed after three bedtime stories, two bedtime songs, and one trip to the bathroom. The babysitters arrived and Will assured them they would be home before midnight. Sophie rolled her eyes behind them, mouthing the word "killjoy" to her big brother.

Standing in front of his apartment building, Will awaited the cab he called for earlier. Sophie bounded down the stairs like she did when she was Bea's age. Will smiled to himself, feeling the good kind of nostalgia.

In the backseat of the taxi, Sophie stared out the window at the city passing by. Will watched her watching the bright lights fly by in a blur. What a pair they were, both broken by other people and looking to each other to pick up the pieces, knowing fully that it would be impossible to even find the pieces, let alone put them back together.

Will and Sophie reached the venue, Sophie tried to pay the cab driver but Will had already handed him the cash. She was annoyed but grateful that he was always taking care of her.

The line to get in the venue wrapped around the corner, but luckily Sophie was on the guest list, meaning they got in ahead of the line. "Bar?" The siblings said in chorus. She ordered her standard gin and tonic and he opted for a scotch, neat. Sophie slammed her credit card down on the counter. "This one's on the ex." She remembered on the ride over that she still had a card on his account and she decided to be as vengeful as she could for the night.

They found a table close enough to the stage to enjoy the music but far enough to wallow in self pity without too many people noticing.

The opening act was tolerable but forgettable and by the time the headliners came on, both Will and Sophie were in three drinks deep.

A hollow, haunting rhythm began.

_I never meant to get us in this deep. I never meant for this to mean a thing. I wish you were the one, wish you were the one that got away._

Will swallowed hard, feeling his throat close up. The lyrics hit him. Hard. He excused himself to the bathroom. He didn't actually head to the bathroom. He went outside, letting the cool night breeze sober him up.

Sophie moved from the table to a stool at the bar and ordered another drink. She closed her eyes and let the music be the only thought in her head.

_You'll always be the only one, even when you're not. You'll always be the only one, even when you're gone._

Outside, Will could hear the music. He couldn't get far enough away. Even if he could, it would still echo in his head.

Inside, Sophie was nursing drink number four when a handsome blonde approached her.

"Hello," she mumbled.

"Hey. I'm Cary. "

She turned away from him. "Bye."

At that very expedient moment, Sara, Sophie's friend who had invited her to the show, walked up. "Sophie! What's up? How are you liking the show?"

"It would be great if every song didn't remind me of my poor, sad, pitiful life."

"Who came with you? This guy?" Sara looked to the man who was still standing next to Sophie.

"Oh, no, my brother. He's around here…somewhere."

"Good, because this is Cary and he's a lawyer piece of shit."

Cary laughed. "C'mon, Sara. I'm not always a piece of shit." He moved around Sophie and hugged Sara. "It's good to see you. It's been a while."

"Have you met Sophie? She's a phenomenal writer. She used to review shows 'til she got too good for us."

"Well, I was trying when you came along," confessed Cary.

"I don't know how I feel about lawyers but I do have a pretty solid track record with pieces of shit," Sophie joked.

They all chuckled. Sara was called from back stage and she scurried off without a goodbye.

"Well, I guess we're friends now," Cary said.

"Oh yeah?" Sophie did think he was cute but he probably knew her brother and that was a situation she did not want to get into or maybe she did. It could be an easy way to get things off her mind. "If we're friends, I guess you can buy me a drink."

"I suppose I could," Cary said as he motioned to the bartender to make two more drinks.

"So…you're a lawyer."

"Guilty," he jested.

Sophie teased, "And a funny one…"

"We're not all boring. In fact, this one is having a party after the show. You should come."

She hesitated, knowing she should find Will and get home to Bea, but she continued her reckless streak. "That sounds like it could be—fun."

Then, Sophie felt a hand on her shoulder. "What-the-hell-are-you-doing-with-my-sister?" Will barked from behind her.

She was stunned. "Wait…what? You know Cary, Will?"

"Yeah, clearly he didn't tell you his last name."

Cary looked sheepishly at the ground. "Whoa, man. I didn't mean anything. I didn't know she was your sister. Not that you own her…"

"What's your last name?" Sophie asked.

"It's, uh, Agos."

"As in Florrick/Agos?"

"Guilty, again."

Sophie rubbed her temples, feeling the effects of the alcohol a little too much. Will fumed behind her. "Sorry, this is awkward. I have to go."

"See you around…" he said cunningly.

Sophie and Will walked briskly outside. Will led and Sophie held onto the tail of his shirt like she was five years old.

"I can't believe you. I can't believe him."

"Will—neither of us knew. It was harmless. He was flirting. It was nice." She spoke in short sentences, treading lightly.

"Nothing he does is nice." He hailed a cab and they got in without saying a word.

As, they pulled up to his door and got out, Sophie whispered, "You might be more messed up than me."

Will heard her but didn't acknowledge it. _Yeah, I might be_, he thought.


	2. tied to my finger

_Thank you for all the kind reviews!_

_More Alicia. This may also seem a little OOC for Will but I promise it will make sense (hopefully). I wanted to show a side of Will we didn't get to see too often. _

_Again, I own nothing. Enjoy._

/

Leaving the concert at 10pm is the root to many problems for Will that night. Bea was sleeping on the couch. He was pissed off at Sophie. He didn't have much room to hide in his own apartment.

He went to the kitchen and poured an abnormally full glass of scotch. Sophie watched judiciously. Unflinching, Will walked into his study and closed the door behind him, hoping to signal that he most certainly did not want to talk. Walking solemnly into the room, he first placed his iPhone on the docking station and set it to the saddest songs he could find. Bach's "Come, Sweet Death" played sat down on the small leather loveseat and turned the lights off. Will Gardner was in dead center in the land of full-on wallow. He hadn't allowed himself to go there, not in the past two years, not in the past twenty. Tonight, there was no going back.

Sophie understood. She was drunk but she understood. This is where she and Will were different. He preferred to remain composed, never letting emotion get the best of him. Grief was private. Sophie, on the other hand, was very often wild with rage, dancing with ecstasy, lying on the bathroom floor in misery. She felt everything too deeply.

The siblings had a sorrowful night; alone, in the same apartment, but alone. In some ways, it was exactly what they both needed. It was a night of grieving and a night of healing. Will, in his study, lying on the couch, scotch in one hand, somber music playing, came to the conclusion that he needed to get her back. He needed to stop the hostile act he played whenever she was around and he needed to convince her they could work it out, whatever it was. Sophie, strangely sober, on the balcony overlooking the cool Chicago night, playing sad songs on her guitar, came to the conclusion that the only people she needed to please were herself and her daughter. The Gardner siblings woke the next morning feeling resolute in their decisions and determined to do what had to be done.

Surprisingly, both Sophie and Will woke before Bea the next morning. They moved around the apartment in a silent tango, knowing that it would be best not to discuss any of the last night's events but not quite sure how to break the ice. Will made coffee. Sophie turned the news on. He sat down next to her on the couch. She leaned into her brother's shoulder, raising the white flag. Will sighed contently, accepting her silent apology and offering one of his own. Words would not solve their problems and at the root of them, they were not in the least bit angry at each other. They were each on the end of a gun pointed in the wrong direction.

Bea bounded out of the guestroom. Her childish lightness was something that revived the happy bits inside of both her mother and her uncle. She was the glue between them and for them.

"Goooooooooood Morning, friends!"

The adults laughed. Bea frowned at them. "Well, you are my friends, right?"

"Yes, baby," Sophie said, reassuringly. She held out her arms and motioned for Bea to come to her. As Bea climbed into her mother's lap, she stopped at her uncle for a quick kiss on her forehead. "Hi, Honey Bea." She rolled her eyes.

Sophie wrapped her arms around Bea's small body; breathing in the baby smell that still lingered on the four year old's skin. "Love you," she whispered into the little girl's honey blonde hair.

Bea replied, "Love you too, Mama. And Uncle Will." Will beamed. Sophie loved how much he loved his niece. Will kissed her forehead again.

"What's on the agenda today, ladies?" He asked.

Sarcastically, Sophie said, "I thought we'd flounder in self-pity this morning and we'd spend the afternoon playing the 'what-if' game…"

Will chuckled. "Damn, I already did that last night!"

"You and me, both."

Bea said, "I thought we'd have a picnic in the park and maybe go to the lake." Sophie admired the way her daughter always knew exactly what she wanted and knew exactly how to get it.

Will responded truthfully, "That sounds like a perfect day and I can't think of anyone else I'd like to spend it with."

An hour later, they were all dressed and ready to go. Will was wearing an oddly casual outfit of jeans and a button up, Sophie: black leggings and an old Fleetwood Mac shirt, and Beatrice in a floral sun dress and leather jacket.

"Love the outfit, Bea," said her uncle, raising an eyebrow at his sister.

Her mother stated, "She dressed herself…"

They walked outside into the warm sun, letting it heat their skin and thaw their sorrow. Sophie buckled Bea into the backseat of Will's car and climbed into the front seat. After a quick stop at the local deli, they got to the park. Apparently, they were not the only ones with plans for a picnic that day. There were soccer games and people flying kites and couples walking around holding hands. Will shielded his eyes with his hand and scouted a spot. They eventually found one under a large tree. Bea declared it perfect. Sophie spread out a blanket and set their belongings on top of it. Bea had brought a ball and asked if she could play with it in front of the blanket. Soon, a few others joined in and Bea played and giggled with the children. Sophie lay down and Will sat next to her.

"I wish I could remember when everything was so easy," he remarked.

"I do," said Sophie. "I remember when I was little and you would drive me around in your convertible and let me sit in the front seat. You'd put the top down and I swore I was flying. Nothing could ever feel like that again. I was carefree and with my big brother, what more could I have asked for?"

"Mom hated when I did that," Will laughed. "It's so crazy to me that you're all grown up now. Sometimes I forget that you're not Bea's age and I'm not coming home from college on the weekends to hang out with my kid sister."

"I wish I wasn't."

"Me too. I never imagined things could be this complicated."

With a change in spirit, Sophie said, "Or this wonderful. A few months ago, I thought my life was over. I thought I'd lost everything. I realized last night that as long as I have Bea, I have everything I need. I don't know where I'd be without her."

Will smiled, looking up at Bea running in the deep green grass, chasing her soccer ball, laughing. "I'm proud of you, you know? You're such a great mom."

"Aw, thanks, Will. Sometimes it's hard, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. Having you makes it easier too. She really loves you."

"I really love her too. She's good for me."

Lunch was a simple spread of sandwiches, fruit, and iced tea. After they gorged themselves, Bea leaned against her mother and set to teaching her uncle some new songs. They sang one about 5 little monkeys and one about a slippery fish. Bea was hysterical hearing her uncle sing these silly songs. Everyone was happy. It was that simple.

Later, Bea asked if they could go to the playground near the soccer fields. Obliging, Sophie and Will packed up the picnic and walked away swinging Bea between them.

"Uncle Will, come swing with me!"

Hesitating, but not wanting to disappoint a little girl, Will followed her to the swings. It had been a long time since he'd been on a playground.

Sophie found an empty bench and set down her bags and found her cell phone. She quickly opened to camera to capture this rare sight. Will smiled. He laughed. He let go. Sophie had to save that moment for him and for herself, to remind her that it was possible.

She looked around the park. The little kids playing soccer had been replaced by older ones. Sophie watched for a minute. She used to play soccer, a lifetime ago. Grabbing her purse, she shouted to Will that she was going to the bathroom. While she was washing her hands, she heard a semi-familiar voice.

"Well, we can't stop running into each other…"

Sophie looked in the mirror before turning around. Alicia.

"Hey!" She said with a tone so happy, it came out saccharine. "What are you doing here?"

"In the bathroom? Or—at the park?" Alicia asked incredulously, but with a smile.

Sophie laughed. "At the park, I mean. It's strange enough for my brother to be here."

The two women walked out of the bathroom. Alicia said, "Um…well, my daughter has a soccer game and I miss so much during the week that I try to catch one on the weekend…" She stopped. "Your brother is here?"

"Yep, on the swings."

Alicia looked at her in disbelief. "Will Gardner? On the swings?"

"With my daughter. He'd do anything she asked. I think she's getting a pony next week." Sophie laughed to herself; also thinking about how out of character it was for her brother. "You should say 'hi.' He'd really like that."

"Oh, I don't know about that. He's not exactly my biggest fan lately."

"You'd be surprised…about a lot of Will Gardner things."

Alicia debated the offer and reluctantly walked back toward the soccer field and the playground with Sophie, who instantly realized what drew her brother to this woman. She was confident but humble. She was quietly funny. She was striking in a way that should've made Sophie self conscious but instead made her instantly comfortable.

Will noticed Sophie talking to a dark haired woman as she walked back from the bathroom and as he slid down the slide with Bea on his lap. His stomach turned for a number of reasons. They reached the bottom and he slid right on his behind into the wood chips that sat at the bottom of the playground. Bea cackled. He stood her up and quickly tried to gather his composure, wiping the shards of sticks from his pants as they approached.

"Nice save, Will," Sophie said deviously. "I found someone I think you know…"

Alicia stepped up and tried to contain her giggles. "H-i-," she sputtered out.

"Hello," Will said, trying to maintain the cold demeanor he'd developed around her recently.

Sophie grabbed Bea's hand and took her away to give Will and Alicia some privacy.

"So, this is one place I never thought I'd run into Will Gardner."

Dropping his guard halfway, Will said, "That makes two of us, but what the niece wants, the niece gets."

"Funny, that's exactly what your sister said. It's nice to see this side of you…"

"The side where I fell on my ass?"

"No, the happy side. I haven't seen it in a while."

Will agreed, "I haven't either. I have to admit, it feels good."

Alicia turned to face the soccer field. "I should get back to Grace's game. It was good to see you outside of the courthouse."

"You too," he said sincerely.

Mustering all his courage, he called out, "Hey, Leesh, do you think we could talk sometime? I promise to leave the hostility at home."

Alicia smiled and Will's heart swelled, inconspicuously. "Sure, I think we can manage that."

Will waited until she was back in her spot on the sidelines before looking to find his sister and niece. He soon noticed they were sitting on the bench with their bags. Bea was crying in Sophie's arms. Will rushed to his niece.

"What happened?" He asked urgently.

"She fell and scraped her knee. She's okay but I think she's tired. Maybe we should head out."

Bea sobbed into her mother's chest. Will scooped Beatrice up and didn't even notice the tears and other fluids she wiped on his shirt as he patted her back. Sophie grabbed their things and they walked back to the car. Bea was asleep before they made it past the long driveway out of the park.

Sophie looked at her brother who wore a permanent smile and asked, "So, I take it things went well with Alicia?"

He snapped out of his euphoric state and said, "I think so. I hope so."

Later that night, Will sat at the counter while Sophie made dinner. He fumbled with his phone and then with a leap of courage, opened a text message to her. He re-typed it at least 10 times before deciding on a final message. "Hey, what are you doing tonight? Come over for dinner." Will knew this was not like him but he couldn't help it. He felt like he was on the swing with Bea again, leaving the old Will at the bottom with his feet planted in the ground and flying with the new Will into the sky. He was uninhibited. He felt strange but sure about the text he'd written as he pressed the unchangeable, unforgivable send button. Love is strange.

**I had the next chapter written but then I decided to change it up a bit so it'll be up by the end of the week.**


	3. a little love letter

_Sorry this took so long and ends so quickly. I had some family stuff happen last week that I needed to deal with. Thank you all for the kind reviews! You don't know how much they mean! PS: The Sophie thing is kind of a mess up on my part. I started the story and could not remember what Will's sisters' names were and then I kind of got attached to Sophie and here we are. _

_This chapter serves two purposes. The first is to introduce Sophie to some key characters that will come into play in the future and the second is to explain what should have happened in New York. ;) _

_Again, I own nothing._

/

Will was setting the table for dinner when he heard his phone ping with a text message. His sister, Sophie, grabbed the phone before he could. "What are you waiting for, big brother?" She asked in a sing-song voice.

"Nothing. None of your business."

"Then I guess you won't mind if I read this text message out loud…"

"Sophie. Give me my phone. Stop."

Sophie relented, handing Will his phone.

Will quickly keyed in his pass code, seeing that the message was from Diane regarding their trial the next day. He set his phone down, disappointed. His sister could read the expression on his face and thought it best not to say anything. "Why don't you go get Bea ready to eat?" She asked, hoping to get his mind off the subject, which she assumed could only be one thing…or person.

They ate dinner with quiet chatter coming and going. Bea was still exhausted from their day at the park and was not her usual talkative self. Will was glad. He was not in the mood for silliness and he didn't want to snap at his niece. The rest of the night passed quietly.

The next morning, Will woke early to go for a run. After five miles, he returned home to find his sister was awake and making pancakes.

"Hey," she said. "I'm making breakfast."

"I see. I'm going to take a shower."

Sophie noticed he was back to his solemn behavior. She knew he was in pain. She knew what it felt like to have someone fill your heart with love like helium in a balloon and then pop it with the simple prick of a pin. She wished there was something she could do.

Will emerged from his room, dressed in a neat suit, briefcase in hand. He grabbed a pancake with a paper napkin in his other hand as he walked towards the door. "I'll probably be late; don't wait for me with dinner."

"Bea wants to know if we can bring you lunch."

"I don't know when I'll be back in the office. It probably won't be until after 2."

"That's fine. We'll see you then! Love you!" She kissed him on the cheek.

Will left, thinking about how his sister had become so much like their mother lately. He kind of liked it. William Gardner liked having someone taking care of him…not that'd he'd ever admit it.

He took the elevator to the underground parking lot. Getting into his car, he heard his phone go off. He sat down in the car and pulled his phone out of his breast pocket. It was a text…from Alicia. If it was possible for your stomach to actually drop into your shoes, it would have happened to Will at that exact moment.

Fumbling, nervous, Will opened the message. It was succinct, as messages from her always were.

_"Sorry. Had kids last night. Fell asleep early. This week?" _

Their entire relationship had been defined by bad timing. He began to wonder if they'd ever have good timing; if they'd ever want the same thing at the same time and be able to have it. Will threw the car into drive and sped out of the parking lot.

Sophie sat on the balcony outside his loft, sipping hot coffee and enjoying the quiet before the storm woke up. She felt curiously at peace. Maybe things were getting better. Easier. Her mind drifted to the past; before Bea, before marriage.

She was eight or nine years old. Will was away at Georgetown for law school. She remembered being so excited that he was coming home for a break. She came home from school that day and changed into the Georgetown sweatshirt he had sent her. She waited at the top of the stairs, keeping her sentry post for what felt like hours, declining dinner, denying the sleepiness that was overtaking her eyelids. When he finally came home, he had a girl with him. Sophie became so enraged that she didn't speak to him the entire time he was there. This was supposed to be her time with her big brother. She didn't see him that often because he was always at school. She had made plans for them. They were going to play baseball and go to the movies and ride in his convertible.

Sophie now realized that her anger was misplaced. She didn't have a right to be angry that Will had disregarded the plans he didn't even know about. His sister also recalled that the girl had dark hair and creamy skin. "Holy shit," she thought to herself. "It was Alicia. All this time, it's been her."

Still in a state of reminiscence, Sophie thought about how Will reacted to her snub that weekend. He kept trying to talk to her. He offered her the world and all she wanted was his time. Alicia left after a day and they could have spent the rest of the time together but by that point Sophie had dug herself a pit of resentment and she was not going to climb out.

It was always like this. Sophie always expected things of people that they couldn't give her, mostly because she didn't ask for them. She was mature enough to accept her faults.

"Love is strange", she said out loud to no one.

"What is strange, Mama?" she heard a voice call.

Sophie laughed. "Everything."

Bea immediately found the pancakes and buzzed through the rest of the morning. Sophie got Bea dressed and grabbed her laptop. They headed to the park around the block from Will's apartment. Bea played easily with the other children and Sophie sat under a tree and worked on her latest project. She was writing a memoir about her time as a travelling music journalist. She hadn't wanted to do that at all but conceded when she saw the first advance the day after she'd gotten legally divorced. The money would help them start over and that's all she really wanted.

The girls returned to the apartment and ate a quick lunch. Then Sophie asked if Bea wanted to see where Uncle Will worked. Bea responded with an enthusiastic nod of her head.

Entering the office, Sophie looked around for her brother. Someone stopped her and asked if they could help.

"I'm looking for my brother, Will Gardner. He said he'd be back around 2."

"Oh, okay. He just returned. His office is that way." The man pointed down the hall, towards an office with a glass wall.

Sophie grabbed Bea's hand and they headed toward the office. An intimidating woman with short blonde hair and a gorgeous pearl necklace stopped them.

"Hello."

"Hi," Sophie replied brightly.

"Who…are you?" The woman asked, fearlessly.

"Oh, I'm Sophie Gardner."

The woman relaxed a bit. "Will's sister? I'm Diane, one of the partners."

"It's nice to meet you!"

"You too. Who is this?" Diane asked as she moved her gaze down about two feet.

"I'm Beatrice Gardner Salerno." The child stuck out her right hand. Diane, without a second thought, reached down to shake it.

"Well, Hello! If you don't tell your uncle, I'll show you where the candy is."

Bea looked up at her mother who nodded with permission. The little girl and the fierce woman walked away. Sophie walked into her brother's office.

"Delivery." She placed a paper bag on his desk.

Will looked up and offered a half-smile. "Thanks, where's Bea?"

Sophie turned and pointed to Diane's office where the two were meticulously choosing a piece of candy.

"She's some kind of magic," Sophie said proudly.

"Yes, she is. I've never seen Diane with a kid before."

"This seems to be a week of firsts."

Diane returned Bea to Will's office and walked away, leaving Bea with a wink. Bea held out her hand and showed her mother and uncle her spoils. She smiled sweetly at her mother, batting her eyelashes.

Sophie could not resist. "Just one piece."

Just then, a woman with jet black hair, sienna skin, and knee high leather boots came in the office. "Will, the Pattersons are her e to see you."

"Thanks, Kalinda. I'll be right in." He turned to his sister and said, "Sorry, I'm really busy this week."

Sophie smiled sweetly and said, "It's okay, we just wanted to bring you lunch."

Will stood and walked towards the door, stopping to tenderly kiss the top of Bea's head, as well as his sister's.

As Sophie and Bea left the office, they ran into Kalinda again, literally. Bea was talking about how she wanted to be a lawyer, or maybe a unicorn, when she was 27 and she walked right into Kalinda's legs.

"Shit—sorry. Sorry."

The woman answered, in a soft British accent, "Don't worry about it. Are you related to Will?"

"I'm his sister, Sophie, and this is my daughter Beatrice."

"I think I've seen pictures. I should get going. See you later."

Kalinda she walked away briskly. Bea reached up and took her mother's hand. They exited the office, swinging their arms.

The rest of the week went by quietly. Will was busy with work. Sophie and Bea did their best to stay out of his way. They spent a lot of time at the park and the library. These were places Sophie could work and Bea could play. Sophie felt guilty that Bea was missing out on preschool this year and made a point to research schools in the area.

/

At the end of the week, Will had a conference in New York City. He left early Thursday morning before either of the girls had woken up. He was never good at goodbyes, no matter how long they were for.

When he arrived at his hotel in the city, he opened his suitcase to find a stack of Bea's artwork. They had written him cards. Will picked up one off the top. It had a picture, obviously drawn by Bea, and his sister's neat handwriting. It read, "Dear Uncle Will, have fun in New York. Bring me a present. Please. I love you—Bea." At the bottom of the page, he noticed his sister had added her own note. "Will—Make good choices. ;)"

Will might have mentioned that not only was Lockhart/Gardner going to be at the conference but Florrick/Agos would be as well. His sister might have giggled like a little girl at this. Her brother was named one of Chicago's most eligible bachelors but he gave his heart away a long time ago and Sophie loved the idea of Will and Alicia being together.

In Chicago, Sophie and Bea resumed their newly formed routine: get up, eat breakfast, get dressed, go to the library, eat lunch, take a nap, go to the park, eat dinner, take a bath, and go to bed. It seemed a little mundane when she thought about it but that's exactly what they needed.

While at the conference, Will had run into Alicia a few times. Their meetings were brief and distant. His spurt of candidness was spurned by reality and responsibility. However, his last night in New York, Will was again struck with a streak of recklessness.

It all started when that familiar face was seated at the table next to him in a crowded diner on his last night in the city. His heart leapt into his throat so hard he thought it would come out of his nose. As much as he wanted to keep up the cool and distant demeanor he had put on around her, when he saw her, he thought of that day at the park. He saw the way she relaxed, letting her hair blow imperfectly around her face. He thought of the impulsive text message he sent her that night. He wanted to be angry, oh, did he wish he could be angry around her but as soon as she walked by and the delicate scent of her perfume hit his nose, all the anger and contempt went out the diner door.

"Hey," she said coolly.

Will stared at his plate, wishing there was more liquid courage in his glass. "Long time, no see."

"Funny how I keep running into you-funny how timing works." Alicia said, her voice decrescent.

They kept their distance, making polite but reserved conversation. Will wanted to say something, to grab her hand, to move into the chair next to her, but he restrained himself. His restraint exhibited as disinterest.

Alicia leaned over and whispered, "What the hell is wrong with you? Last week, you were introducing me to your family and asking me to dinner and now you barely look at me."

"To be fair, my family introduced themselves to you. I had no part in that and as far as asking you to dinner, maybe I was drunk. Maybe I was stupid."

She scoffed. "Bull. Shit. Will, you forget I know you. I can tell when you're holding something back and I can tell you for a fact that right now you are holding back."

Will stood up briskly. He walked away from the table without saying a word, knowing that if he did, he would lose it. He would say everything he wanted to say in the last two years and William Paul Gardner had more self respect than that…or so he thought.

He walked to the cash register and paid both his and Alicia's tab. The hostess asked, "Do you want me to tell her who paid for it?"

"Just tell her I'm in room 203," Will said brusquely. He resisted the urge to turn and look at her and rushed out the door. His undisciplined side was showing itself more and more often lately.

/

Sophie was thankful for summer breaks from school that night. Her friend Sara called and asked her to meet for drinks and Sophie needed a break. Luckily, Will's neighbors were home and willing to sit at the apartment with Bea while she went out.

Sophie walked in the bar and spotted her friend. "Hot damn, am I glad to see someone who doesn't need help going potty or tying their shoes."

Sara laughed. "Well, you certainly know how to make a girl feel good about herself."

The women spent the night laughing and drinking, drinking and reminiscing, dancing and drinking. Ordinarily, Sophie would hear Will's voice in the back of her head. She'd feel the devil sitting on her shoulder. Recklessness was running rampant in the Gardner family and for once, Sophie welcomed it.

/

In his hotel room, Will poured himself a drink. He sat down on the couch. He got up. He took his jacket off. He paced. He sat down on the bed. He got up. He paced. His mind raced. Would she show up? What would he say? Would he be able to maintain restraint? Did he want to?

His spinning head was interrupted by a knock at the door. His palms were soaking wet by the time he grabbed the handle.

There she was, Alicia Florrick, in all her glory, at his hotel room door.

"Will Gardner. I don't know what the hell this is about but I swear that you are the most confusing, infuriating person I have ever met."

He put his hand on her face. Her eyes widened and she started to say something. His mouth reached hers before the sound escaped. At first, she stiffened. She didn't kiss him back. He ran his fingers through her hair and pulled her closer. She sighed with her whole body and leaned into him, conceding. When he kissed her, he tasted anger and regret and resentment. When she kissed back, he tasted only desire.

He led her into the hotel room, never losing contact. Will's hands tried to make up for lost time while his mouth found the places it had once loved. She was even better than he remembered. They fell onto the bed. They had both waited too long for this.

When he awoke, he looked at the clock. _3:42. _His limbs were tangled in Alicia's. He felt her breath on his chest. _Perfect timing_, he said quietly.


	4. i carry with me

_Again, thank you for reviewing and being so patient with my slow updates. Life is super busy right now but it should be slowing down soon and I should be able to update much more often._

_Lastly, I own nothing except my ideas about how things should have gone down._

Will returned to Chicago, trying to hide the permanent smile that had taken residence upon his face. It was no use. Sophie and Bea picked him up from the airport in his car.

"I take it your trip went well," Sophie said trying to conceal her own smile.

Will responded carefully, "Yeah, the conference was nice."

"That's not what I meant."

"The rest was nice too and I'll tell you more about it later when we don't have little ears listening," Will said, noticing that Bea was unusually interested in their conversation. "Little Bea, what did I miss while I was gone?"

"Well…nothing. We went to the library. The boys were bad while the library lady was reading. Mama told me we could get bikes for the summertime. Did you bring me a present?"

"You cut straight to the point," Sophie said laughing.

Will said, "In fact…I did."

Bea's eyes widened. Her mouth formed a circle. "What—what is it?"

"It's a surprise. You can have it when we get home."

They pulled into Will's assigned parking space a few minutes later. Bea unbuckled herself from her car seat and waited impatiently for someone to open the door. She bounded up the stairs with her mother and uncle following and trying to keep up. Will opened his apartment door and Bea sighed loudly.

"Uncle Willlllllllllll, can I have my present now?"

Will opened his suitcase and pulled out a plastic bag with the "Build-A-Bear" logo on it.

Bea hurriedly opened the bag and pulled out a soft, stuffed pony wearing an "I 3 New York" shirt. "Oh. My. Gosh. I cannot believe it." The little girl ran to her uncle and threw her arms around his neck.

Sophie admired her big brother from the kitchen. She was always surprised at how good he was with Bea, even though she shouldn't be. She knew how he was. She knew that underneath his tough exterior was a genuinely good guy.

Bea went to play with her new toy. Sophie threw her arms around her brother's neck. "I missed you, big brother. I can't believe you went to 'Build-A-Bear.'"

Will grinned. "I might have had a little assistance from someone who has a little experience in the area."

"Shut up. Tell me right now."

"Do you want me to shut up or tell you?"

Sophie punched his arm. "Spill."

They sat on the couch. Will started, "I saw her at the conference and she looked so damn beautiful and there was nothing I could do. We were surrounded by work."

Sophie said, "Okay and then…?"

"Then I saw her at a diner and I couldn't control myself anymore. We bantered back and forth. She ended up pissed off. "

"William Paul Gardner, I cannot believe you right now," Sophie scoffed.

"Just wait, alright. Then I paid her tab and left my room number with the hostess."

Sophie leaned forward in her seat.

Will continued, "I didn't know what the hell I was doing. I just knew I couldn't stand being there with her and not being with her anymore. She showed up. At my hotel room. She was just standing there in the doorway and I couldn't control myself anymore."

"Alright, I can connect the dots there. I don't need to hear the details of my brother having sex. However, I am so happy for you I could scream right now."

Will's eyes sparkled with joy. "Wait, there's more."

"My heart is going to burst. Hurry."

"The next day—yesterday, the conference was over but neither of us was leaving until this morning. We got breakfast. We talked. We went shopping. God, it was like a dream."

Will looked up to see tears in Sophie's eyes. He asked her if she was okay and she just said, "I am so damn happy."

Will leaned back on the couch and said quietly, "Me too."

Sophie inquired, "So…what now?"

"I don't know." Will filled with anxiety. What would happen now? He worried that what happened between them was a New York miracle and he didn't know if the magic would continue.

/

Later that day, Sophie and Bea decided to cook dinner for Will. They snuck out of the apartment and headed to the grocery store while Will napped.

When they returned, Will was still sleeping. Sophie knew he was exhausted from his exciting week. She cleared off the counter to prepare the food, noticing Will's phone was sitting at the edge. As she went to move it to a safer place, it began to ring. She saw Alicia's name pop up and elected to answer it.

"Hello!" She said cheerfully.

Alicia was startled to hear a female voice answer Will's phone and her surprise was expressed when she responded, "H-h-hi. Who is this?"

"Oh, sorry, it's Sophie."

"Hi, how are you, Sophie?" Alicia sighed in relief.

"I'm good, but probably not as good as you."

Alicia laughed a hearty, genuine laugh. "Is Will around?"

"He's sleeping."

"Will you tell him I called?"

"Of course, or you could come to dinner and tell him yourself."

Alicia hesitated slightly, "I guess I could do that, the kids are not home. What time?"

"Around 6? Does that work for you?"

"Sure. See you then."

Sophie hung up the phone and turned around to see Will standing behind her. "Hey, favorite brother."

"Who was that?"

"Uh…Alicia. She's coming over."

Will didn't know how to respond. He was elated and nervous at the same time. He wanted Alicia to get to know his family. He wanted her to be a part of it but he couldn't help thinking about what if she didn't want to be.

He had just put some chicken on the grill on the balcony when he heard the doorbell ring. His stomach dropped just like it did every time he saw her. She made him a wreck and he loved it.

Bea answered the door before he could get to it. Alicia stood there in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. He forgot how to breathe for a minute. Thank God for Bea.

"Hi!"

Alicia bent down to the child's height. "Hi Bea! How are you?"

"I'm good. Uncle Will bought me a pony!"

"Wow! He's a good uncle," she said standing up. She held a bag in her hands filled with cookies and wine. Sophie took the bag from her, giving her a quick hug and a not-so-subtle wink. Alicia smiled warmly.

"Alicia! How are you! How was New York?" Sophie couldn't contain her elation and excitement over the recent developments between Will and Alicia.

"I'm doing well. New York was great but it sounds like Will already told you about that…"

"He did, but I was just making sure you were on the same page. I have to look out for my brother, you know." Alicia looked at Will and smiled. He rolled his eyes at his sister's lack of tact.

"Hey," he said quietly as Alicia moved across the room to meet him. She kissed him on the cheek and returned the greeting. Sophie sneered at the polite exchange between the two.

Will motioned for Alicia to follow him outside. As she turned towards the door, he stuck his tongue out at his sister. Sophie had never seen her brother so happy. She had never seen him so uninhibited. She felt a pang of jealousy; saw a tinge of green, as she watched them exit the apartment. It wasn't that she didn't want her brother to be happy. She wanted that as much as her own happiness. Sophie wondered if she'd ever find anyone else who could make her that happy.

They gathered outside to eat. It was a warm night and the setting sun glowed tangerine. The conversation flowed naturally. Sophie and Alicia talked like old friends. Will sat in admiration of all the strong willed, beautiful women in his life. Bea never missed a beat.

"Mama, can we have ice cream for dessert?"

"Sure, baby girl. Let's go inside and let Uncle Will and Alicia talk."

Alicia and Will were sitting close enough to feel the heat of each other's skin, but not close enough to touch. When Sophie and Bea went inside, Will reached out and brushed Alicia's hand softly. He waited for her to intertwine her fingers into his and when she did, he inhaled deeply, taking it all in.

Finally, he spoke. "Leesh—" he said, using the nickname he had waited two years to exhale. "I want you to know that I don't give a damn what anyone thinks. I want this. I want us. I hated every moment we were apart and I hated myself for not getting you back sooner."

"I want this too, Will. I do, but I don't know how we can do it when everything in the world is conspiring against us: timing, work, the governor, life."

"None of that matters. Fate never gave us good timing and now we have to make our own. I don't care what I have to do. I refuse to let you go again."

Alicia smiled and squeezed his hand. "Me too," she said, gently. Just then, Sophie returned to the balcony, carrying a tray full of cookies, ice cream, bowls, and spoons. Bea carried a can of whipped cream.

As they sat, enjoying the finishing touch to their perfect night, Bea leaned into her mother and whispered something in her ear. Sophie laughed and laughed. Will looked at her like she was absolutely insane. "What was that?"

Sophie replied, with a giggle, "Bea wants to know if Alicia is your girlfriend."

Will and Alicia looked at each other, laughing in seamless unison. "Yes," she said without a hint of hesitation.

/

_Writing happy Will feels very strange but I kind of love it. In the future, please expect much more Alicia, Will hanging with Zach and Grace, and a make-it-or-break-it moment for Willicia. I also had an interesting thought about a potential love interest for Sophie today so that may occur at some point as well. ;)_


	5. smoke rings and cigarettes

_Sorry I suck at updating. Between work and life, it's hard to find time. However, work is almost done! Thank you for reviewing and loving this story. I hope this chapter lives up to your expectations. _

_guategal: Number one, thank you for always leaving such kind words. Number two, the chapter titles are lines from the song "Tip of My Tongue" by the Civil Wars. They don't really correspond directly to each chapter but the song possesses the same themes as I'd like this story to. I always think of the Civil Wars as the ultimate Willicia band. I'd recommend listening to them and this song as you read. :)_

_I do not own the characters or the Good Wife, only my interpretations._

_/_

Will and Alicia both led terribly busy lives which made it difficult for them to spend time together, especially during the week. Their time on the weekends was limited by Alicia's schedule with her kids. Will hated it. He respected it, but he hated it all the same. He knew what he was getting in to and he knew this time around, they were both willing to put more effort in but that was hard when life got in the way.

One Saturday, Will woke up too early. He'd gone to the gym. He'd gotten coffee and it was still only 7am. Alicia liked to sleep in on the weekends and he tried to resist calling her but the minutes passed like he was in high school again, waiting for the bell to ring between class periods. After about 15 minutes of deliberation, he couldn't wait any longer. He picked up the phone and called.

"Hey," he said, obviously alert and awake.

"Ughhhhhhh…" Alicia replied. She had never been a morning person and Will knew it. He liked to use it to his advantage even.

"Leesh, wake up. Get breakfast with me. I haven't seen you since last weekend."

Alicia mumbled something about Grace being there and having a soccer game.

"I don't care about Grace being there. Both of you come and get breakfast with me and then we'll go to her soccer game."

That woke her up. "Will, I don't know. It seems kind of sudden. I haven't even really told the kids about us yet. I just don't know."

"Well then, I guess you'd be kind of mad if I showed up at your house with bagels and coffee then…" He heard the doorbell ring through the phone as he pressed the button.

Alicia opened the door with a sigh. He looked her up and down, taking her in; appreciating the time it took to get to this exact moment; appreciating the Georgetown t-shirt she still slept in after 20 years.

"William Paul Gardner, I am going to kill you." He kissed her, catching the words in his mouth. "You're so lucky, I'm starving," she said, taking the bag from his hand, leading him to the kitchen.

"Sorry for waking you up."

"It's alright," she replied with a mouth full of bagel.

"I'm not sorry for missing you, though."

She stroked his arm. "I missed you too."

A familiar light glimmered in his eyes. "Do you want to take this in the bedroom? I already worked out today but I'd be willing to go again."

"Oh my god," She laughed a deep, hearty laugh that shook her body and shone out of her face. "Will, Grace is here. We can't." She leaned over and kissed him on the mouth softly and then on the forehead. "I can't say I don't appreciate the offer though."

"Damn," he said with a sigh of defeat.

They sat and laughed and ate and laughed some more. Will observed, "This is really nice." Alicia nodded in agreement, taking his hand. Just then, they heard footsteps in the hallway.

"Mom?"

They looked up to see Grace standing there in her pajamas.

"Hi honey," she began.

"Hi, Mom. Hi, Mr. Gardner," Grace said cautiously.

"You can call me Will if you want," he offered.

Alicia swooped in with her normal calm and quick response. "Will brought breakfast."

He interjected, "Yeah, I brought you a coffee too. I didn't know what you took in it or if you even drank coffee but there's milk and sugar in the bag." He hated his tendency to ramble when he was nervous. He could keep it under control in the courtroom but his composure ran out the window when he was at home.

Grace eyed him suspiciously as she moved around the kitchen. "So Mom, is there anything you want to talk about?"

"Well, actually, there is. You remember when I went to New York a few weeks ago?"

Will sat back, not wanting to interrupt their discussion but also not wanting to miss it. Grace nodded stoically.

"We were both there—Will and I. We spent some time together and decided we wanted to be together, like a relationship…"

Grace took her time responding. "Oh…that's cool. He brought good coffee." Will took this as a sign of approval from the girl. Getting Zach's approval would prove harder but right now he was away doing what boys do the summer before starting college.

"So, Grace, I heard you have a soccer game this afternoon. I used to play soccer in high school too. What position do you play?" He had broken the ice, finding common ground. Grace joined the adults' morning conversation seamlessly.

/

Later that day, Will and Alicia walked arm-in-arm through the park, heading to Grace's soccer game. He was surprised when Alicia said it would be alright for him to come. Her situation was delicate being that she was still married and to the governor, no less. Will was prepared to do whatever it took to make Alicia see he was ready to be with her, even if it meant hanging back and allowing her to avoid uncomfortable situations.

Sophie and Bea met them at the park. They walked up to meet Alicia and Will holding hands. Bea's other hand clung tightly to the pony Will brought her back from New York City.

Sophie leaned in and kissed her brother on the cheek. She gave Alicia a quick hug. "Hey guys, how's it going?"

"Very well," Alicia responded.

Will picked up Bea and swung her onto his shoulders. She giggled as she placed her pony on his head. "Mama, I'm going to pretend Uncle Will is a pony! Giddy-up boy!" Will took his orders and sped up ahead of the women.

"That guy is something else," Sophie mused.

"He really is," murmured.

They found a spot on the sideline of the soccer field. Sophie laid out a blanket but no one used it. The game was a close one and it moved fast! They cheered loudly for Grace and her team. Bea even joined in. Before they knew it, the game was over and Grace's team was celebrating their victory on the grass near the goal. Grace soon walked over to greet her cheering section. Her mom hugged her tightly. Will gave her a high five. He then introduced Sophie and Bea.

"Grace, this is my sister, Sophie, and my niece, Bea." Sophie extended her hand for Grace to shake. Bea hugged Grace's legs.

Grace smiled down at the little girl. "Hi Bea! I got the game ball but since you were such a great cheerleader, I think you should have it!"

Bea was stunned. For once in her four years, she didn't know what to say. Sophie nudged her and whispered, "What do you say, Beatrice?"

"Thanks, Grace! I love you! I love it! I love it!" They all chuckled.

Will then declared, "A win like that deserves ice cream." Grace and Bea looked at each other and shouted, "Yes!"

/

The weekend passed swiftly as weekends too often do. It was back to the courtroom for Alicia and Will; back to the writer's chair for Sophie and back to the library playgroup for Bea. Grace and Bea had become fast friends despite having a twelve year age gap between them and sometimes Grace accompanied them on their daily adventures now that school was out.

Will was defending some kid accused of killing a girl at his university and he was rarely ever home. It was a stressful case and he found that he got more work done if he stayed in his office without the distractions of home. This meant Sophie never got a chance to have a moment for herself.

One day, she'd had enough. She'd snapped at Will before he left for work over something so stupid she didn't even remember what it was. She'd snapped at Bea over breakfast. Her patience was fading fast. Sophie loved Bea and she loved being a mom but it was hard. She needed a break so she bit the bullet and called a babysitter for Bea. Luckily, she knew the perfect one.

She sent Grace a text that read, "Want to hang out with your new BFF for a little while so I don't lose my mind completely?"

Grace quickly replied, "Of course! I'd love to."

Sophie packed Bea a bag of toys and extra clothes, knowing how messy she could get, and loaded her into the car she had recently bought for herself. She dropped Bea off at Alicia's apartment and assured Grace she wouldn't be long. Grace told her to take her time. Sophie smiled in relief.

She headed a few blocks away to the nearest salon for a haircut and a manicure, something she hadn't done in a long time. She had just chosen a nail polish color, "Ultra-Violet" when a news alert interrupted the TV. There had been a shooting at the Cook County Courthouse. Sophie felt her stomach fall into her shoes and felt a lump grow in her throat. "Oh shit," she said aloud. The stylist looked up. Sophie said, "I have to go." She hastily grabbed some money out of her wallet and ran out of the store. She frantically tried to call Will. She knew he was at the courthouse then and all she could do was pray that the shooting was in a different courtroom.

She called multiple times. Each time he didn't answer, her anxiety and dread grew. _'Will, answer your phone. Answer your fucking phone and tell me you're alright. I don't know what I'd do without you. I need you so damn bad and so does Bea. Please, just answer.' _Her mind raced. Her life with her brother flashed before her eyes. She collapsed on a bench outside of her car, the wind knocked out of her. The shock prevented her from crying. Then she thought, _'What if he's okay and I'm out here having a panic attack for no reason? I'm sure he's okay. Why wouldn't he be?' _Taking a deep breath, she stood up and got into her car.

Plugging her phone into the car charger so it wouldn't die if Will tried to call, she texted Grace. "Hey, can you keep Bea a little bit longer? Something came up. I'll call you."

Grace's response calmed her a little. "No problem! She's napping now so don't worry about it." Sophie knew Bea would be safe and now she could expend her energy making sure her brother was as well.

Sophie threw the car into drive and headed towards the courthouse. If she couldn't get to her brother on the phone, she'd have to physically find him. She sped through the busy Chicago streets. As she slowed to stop at a red light, her phone rang and she picked it up frantically. Her heart swelled when she saw Will's picture and name pop up.

"Will?! Are you alright?" She almost yelled.

"Sophie?" It was a strange voice and it was certainly not the one Sophie was expecting.

"Who is this? Where's Will? Is he okay?"

"It's Kalinda, we met a few weeks ago at Lockhart/Gardner. I don't know if you've seen the news…"

Sophie interrupted hysterically, "Where is he?"

"He was shot and I don't know what's happening but we're at the hospital right now. I think you should come."

"Shit, shit, shit." Sophie felt the bile rise in her chest. Kalinda gave her directions to the hospital. She paid no heed to speed limits and stop signs on her way. When she arrived, she wasn't even sure how she managed to get there. She was in shock. Her hair was wild from the half of a hair cut she had gotten and only one hand had fingernail polish on it. Sophie couldn't have cared less about any of that. She burst through the Emergency Room doors.

"Will Gardner. Where is he?" She asked at the front desk.

The nurse looked at her sympathetically. "Are you family?"

"Yes, he's my—I'm his sister."

"Well, ma'am, he's in surgery right now and we'll let you know as soon as we know something."

Sophie felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned around to see Kalinda, covered in blood. Sophie threw her arms around a woman she barely knew. She sobbed in her arms. "I can't lose him. I can't." Kalinda remained quiet and allowed Sophie to cry.

Sophie sniffled and tried to pull herself together. "Did you call Alicia?" She asked Kalinda, knowing she understood the history between Will and Alicia.

Kalinda said, "No, I was about to, but I haven't yet."

Sophie wiped the mascara from her wet eyes. "I will. I should." She pulled out her phone and dialed the number, dreading every keystroke.

"Sophie?" Alicia answered.

"Hi, are you busy? Can you get away for a minute? I need to talk to you." Sophie tried to hide the fear in her voice.

"What's wrong?"

"It's Will." Sophie stopped, unable to finish.

Alicia's voice grew panicked. "What happened, Sophie?"

"Have you seen the news?"

"No, I'm at a luncheon."

"He was shot, Alicia. That kid shot him and I don't know what's happening but he's in surgery and I'm really scared."

"I'll be right there. I'll be right there." Alicia regained her calm, a symptom of her own shock.

**PS: I know this could go a lot of different ways but please know that Willicia is endgame for me and I am not the Kings so I've envisioned the consequences of this event quite a bit differently than it happened on the show. That is one of the many joys of fanfiction. ;) Please keep reading. I promise you won't be disappointed.**


	6. outlines and kisses

Thanks for reviewing. Enjoy. Hopefully this answers some questions and keeps you reading. 10 house points to whoever catches the ER reference.

I do not own TGW.

/

The doors to the County General emergency room opened and Alicia ran in. Pieces of dark hair fell loosely around her face and her eyes were bloodshot. It was clear she had been crying and tried to fix herself up before arriving at the hospital. She stopped at the desk and asked for Will Gardner. The nurse pointed her towards the waiting room with an indifferent nod. "Family's in there," she said as Alicia walked away. Alicia's mind was playing through every bad outcome possible. She and Will had finally found their perfect timing and fate came in to mess it up. Their story couldn't end like this, it just couldn't. In the 20 feet of incandescently lit hallway, Alicia Florrick made up her mind: William Paul Gardner was not going to die; not today, not anytime soon. She wouldn't let him.

Sophie looked up and saw Alicia walking towards her. Alicia's patent leather pumps clicked as she moved down the hall. Sophie stood to meet her. Alicia's calm broke when Sophie's arms wrapped around her. The two women wept together in the doorway of the waiting room. When they parted, Alicia wiped her eyes, not caring about the state of her mascara. Sophie collapsed into a chair. Alicia looked around and saw Diane and Kalinda sitting in the same room. Diane hugged her like an old friend, like she shared her hurt. Kalinda waited apprehensively for Alicia to approach her. When she did, she gasped. Kalinda's shirt was covered in blood. "…Kalinda…your shirt…it's got blood on it. Is that Will's?"

Kalinda replied softly, "Yeah…I kind of ran in there when I realized what was happening."

Alicia didn't say anything but instead, she grabbed Kalinda's hand. They embraced. Alicia didn't care about getting blood on her. Her gratitude for Kalinda in that moment erased any contempt left from past indiscretions. Alicia knew Kalinda had saved his life and she knew Kalinda would never admit it.

Alicia sat down next to Sophie to try and calm herself. "Where's Bea?"

Sophie sat up straight. "Shit—she's with Grace. I forgot. I have to call her."

"Don't tell her what happened. Tell her not to turn on the TV. Tell her to order pizza for dinner and keep Bea occupied."

Sophie nodded. Knowing what happened to Will would wreck Bea. Sophie couldn't bear to break her daughter's heart again this year. She dialed the phone and waited for Grace to answer. Instead, Bea answered.

"Hi Mommy!"

Sophie took a deep breath. "Hi, Bea. What are you doing? Are you being good?"

"Yes, Mommy. We're going to make cookies. Is that okay? Can I stay here longer? I don't want to go home yet."

"Let me talk to Grace, baby. I love you."

"Love you too!" Sophie heard Bea drop the phone and then heard Grace subsequently pick it up.

"Hey, Sophie!"

"Hi, Grace. How's it going? She's not being too much of a pain, is she?"

"No way! We're having fun. It's kind of like having a little sister."

"Well, that's good because I kind of need to ask you another favor."

"What's up?"

Sophie gathered her thoughts and made a quick plan. "I was wondering if you could keep Bea for a little while longer. Something has come up and I don't know how long I'll be. I talked to your mom and she said it was okay with her if it was okay with you. She said to order a pizza if you want."

"Sure, that's fine!" Grace replied cheerfully.

"Thank you so much Grace. You're a lifesaver. I owe you big time."

"Don't worry about it!"

"Thanks again. I'll call again when I know what's happening."

"See you later!"

Sophie said, "Bye…" as she pressed the end button on her phone.

She turned to Alicia and said, "You've got a great kid there."

Alicia smiled and accepted the compliment. "She is pretty great, isn't she?" Her smile turned serious. "Do we know what's happening with Will? Is he in surgery? What are the doctors saying?"

Sophie said, "The only thing we know is he's in surgery. They weren't sure how long it would take. They weren't sure where exactly the bullet hit and the doctor said they wouldn't know anything until they got him into the operating room."

Alicia took Sophie's hand and patted it reassuringly. "I know he'll be okay."

Diane, Kalinda, Sophie, and Alicia sat in silence in the vinyl chairs of the waiting room. Sophie, exhausted from the emotions of the situation fell asleep.

She dreamt that she was back in Baltimore in the apartment she shared with her ex-husband and Bea. They lay on the floor of the living room on a quilt, laughing at something unintelligible. Her ex-husband held her hand and let her lay her head on his shoulder. Bea danced around them, singing a song. She remembered what it was like to be happy with them.

Sophie woke up and it wasn't her husband holding her hand but Alicia. Sophie lifted her head and realized she had been drooling on Alicia's shoulder as well. Alicia had fallen asleep and Sophie tried not to wake her. She sat back in her chair and thought about how her life could have turned out so different.

She was not so naïve that she didn't notice things had changed between her and her ex-husband, Adam. He came home later and later. He pulled away from her more than he pulled her close when they were in public. He started missing things with Bea. Sophie chalked it up to stress at work. Being a chef at a five star restaurant was not a simple job. It came with pressure from clients and the owner and other restaurants. Sophie thought he was just tired. She learned later that all her excuses couldn't beat his reason. He'd accepted a job in Paris. He wanted to go as a single man, without any attachments. Those were his exact words. Sophie confronted him after finding the divorce papers. Showing up to his job on a Friday night was probably not the best idea but she was tired of sitting around, crying, with no understanding of the situation. When she finally did know his motives for divorce, she threw up in the garbage bin outside the restaurant. This was not the man she knew. She couldn't comprehend why he was so unwilling to make it work with her. She would've been flexible with him. He'd been flexible with her all the years she'd gone on tour with a million different artists. He could've gone to Paris and she would've waited. Some days she felt like she was still waiting. She was still grieving the loss and she lived between denial and anger. Every day she woke up, hoping to have moved on to acceptance overnight.

She didn't realize she'd fallen back asleep until she felt someone tapping her shoulder. Opening her eyes slowly, she realized it was the doctor. "Excuse me, Ms. Gardner: your brother is out of surgery."

"Where is he? Is he okay?"

"He's in critical condition. I'm not going to say he's okay but there is a pretty good chance he'll pull through. He's still in some danger. The bullets came very close to hitting crucial arteries."

"Bullets? Oh my god. Can I see him?" Sophie was still holding Alicia's hand.

"Yes, you can. Briefly. He's still under the anesthesia so he may be asleep or out of it."

The two women stood up and began to follow the doctor out of the room towards Will.

The doctor turned to them and said, "Sorry, family only."

Sophie pulled Alicia close. "She is family," she affirmed, her eyes sternly convincing the man in the green scrubs. He seemed to accept her assertion and kept moving. He led them into a room with a sliding glass door. The glass was covered by white hospital curtains and he pulled them back as he walked through.

Will lie in the bed, connected to wires and tubes, and his skin was so pale Sophie was unsure if the doctor was telling the truth when he said her brother was okay. Both Sophie and Alicia leaned on each other for support. Alicia's other hand covered her mouth. Sophie approached her brother and kissed him on the forehead. He stirred. "Alicia," he slurred.

Alicia moved to the opposite side of the bed as Sophie. She sat next to him, being careful to avoid touching his chest. "I'm here. I'm here, Will."

Will opened his eyes slowly and closed them again. He tried to lift his hand but movement was restricted by the IV in his arm. "Alicia…"

She leaned in and kissed his cheek gently. "Will, I'm here. Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere. Rest."

"Alicia, I love you." He said with his eyes still closed.

Sophie took a step back, letting them have their moment.

"I love you too. Don't try to talk anymore. I need you to rest."

Will seemed to fall back asleep before she even finished talking. The two women kept vigil by his bed all night. They alternated so the other could make phone calls, get a cup of coffee, and get some fresh air. Sophie called their mother. She would arrive the early the next morning. She called Adam. She informed him of the situation and asked him to take Bea. He was supposed to take her for a few weeks starting that weekend anyway. Much to Sophie's surprise and delight, he consented. Maybe he hadn't changed so much. He'd always been good with her family, even when they weren't so good to him. They never thought he was good enough for her and made no qualms about letting him know. When Bea was born, they loosened up a little. She had that power. Sophie then called Grace, making sure that Bea was not too much trouble. Grace said they watched a movie and Bea fell asleep so she was no trouble at all. Alicia had called her earlier and told her what happened. Grace offered her sympathy and a prayer to Sophie. Sophie had never been one for prayer but she thought it couldn't hurt.

Lastly, she made a call to Kalinda. She and Diane left after Will was brought out of surgery. They had things to address at the office in regards to Will's condition. Sophie promised she'd give them an update. Kalinda thanked her and said she'd share the news with Diane. Will had not gotten any worse at that point. The doctors said every hour he went without declining was a good sign for his recovery and Sophie would take anything, no matter how small, as a mark of hope.

The next morning, they awoke to the sunlight streaming in the window, casting shadows on the tile floor. Sophie slept in a chair closest to the door. Alicia slept on the bench under the window, using her suit jacket as a pillow. Will woke up and groaned in pain. Alicia sat up and said, "How are you feeling?"

"Like I got shot," Will laughed and then grimaced. "Ouch."

"Will-," they both groaned.

"Alicia?"

"What?" She responded, the sleep still lingering in her voice.

"Do me a favor."

"What, Will?"

"Actually two. Number one: find the call button so I can get some damn pain medicine."

Alicia stood up and walked toward his bed. She pulled the button out from the side of the bed. "Okay, what's number two?"

Will smiled deviously.

Alicia feigned annoyance. "Will, what is it?"

"Marry me."

**Oooooh. What now? Actually, I'm kind of stuck so if you have questions you want answered, please let me know and I'll do what I can to incorporate them. :) **


	7. never saw you comin'

_Thanks for reviewing! You guys are always so kind! Thank you for the suggestions. They were very helpful in breaking through this wall. I think I have a pretty good idea of how I want this to play out now._

_I know I suck at updating but I'm done with work for the summer now so I should be able to update much more often. I've already started writing the next chapter._

_As always, I do not own TGW but I have a lot of ideas about how things would go if I did._

Will slipped in and out of consciousness seamlessly. He woke up and the lights were so bright he was forced to close his eyes again. He woke up again and could hear people talking but the pain medication he was on made it hard to focus so he closed his eyes yet again. This cycle continued for most of the first night he was in the hospital. He woke the next morning and made an effort to be more present but he was faced with the choice of being in awful pain and being aware or taking more medication and being dazed. He chose the latter that day. He knew no one would blame him and for the first time in a long time, he chose his own needs over the needs of others.

Unable to distinguish present from past in his state of semi-consciousness, Will's mind often drifted to years past. Lying on your deathbed is a perfect opportunity to flounder in regret and wonder what might have happened if you had just made one different choice in life.

/

William Gardner had always known he would be a lawyer. His father was a lawyer and his grandfather had been as well. He was fascinated by the suits and briefcases and mystery that seemed to linger around his father when Will was a child. On his first day of classes at Georgetown Law, he arrived embarrassingly early, hoping to be the first to class and to make a good impression on the professor. His years of undergrad had not taught him that no one really cares if you're the first one to class. However, this goal didn't matter because when he walked into the large lecture hall, he noticed a woman sitting in the front row of desks. He'd been beat. Someone else was just as eager as he was. He walked in with a confident swagger and sat next to this woman.

He turned to her and said, "I guess I'm not the biggest nerd in law school…"

She laughed. He took a mental picture of her laugh. Her whole face lit up and her eyes became dark circles engulfed by creamy cheeks. The laugh itself was deep and came from her belly. He wasn't upset about being in second place anymore.

"I guess not," she said as she regained composure.

"I'm Will Gardner," he said as he extended his right hand.

Taking it, she replied, "Alicia Cavanaugh."

"It's very nice to meet you, Alicia."

She pushed the hair back from her eyes and said, "You too, Will."

Just then, an older man in a sweater vest and plaid tie walked in. Looking around the room, he muttered, "Ah, overachievers. There's one in every crowd…but I guess we have two today."

Will and Alicia looked at each other and giggled.

The class passed on and as it became time for their first exam, Will and Alicia found each other in the library frequently and soon became study partners. They spend late nights pouring over thick old books, elbows deep in highlighters and notepads. Late nights sometimes turned into early mornings at coffee shops, exhaustion rimming their eyes, hands shaking from the amount of caffeine they had ingested to compensate for the exhaustion.

After their first exam was over and passing grades had been posted, the pair went out to a local pub with some other classmates to celebrate. Both of them drank too much and decided not to drive back to their apartments. Instead, they shared a cab back to campus. Sitting in the back of the cab, Will's hand felt a magnetic pull to Alicia's. Uninhibited, he grabbed it. She let him. They stared out their own windows, scared to see what might happen if they looked at each other. They pulled up to Alicia's building and got out of the cab. Will took care of the fare and the tip while Alicia fumbled to pull her keys out of her coat pocket.

"Thanks for getting that," she said as her keys fell to the ground.

Will picked them up, handed them to her and said, "Don't worry about it."

"Will, thanks for studying with me. I don't know if I would have passed without you."

"Please! You know the material front and back. I'm the lucky one."

Even in the darkness of 2am, Will could see Alicia was blushing. He pulled her in for a hug. As they separated, she started to say goodbye but he silenced her with a gentle kiss.

"Will…"

"Alicia."

She kissed him this time. "I like to be first, remember?"

"I think you can take second this time. I've been runner-up to you plenty of times."

They laughed. Will took her hand again, intertwining his fingers with hers. He walked her to the door and when they reached it, he pulled her face towards him and kissed her again, lingering a bit longer this time.

After that night, they spent all of their time together, which really wasn't that much different than before except now they sat a little closer. Will snuck kisses in the long abandoned rows of the library. Her hand would softly graze his as she reached for a book. He would watch her leave from the room. She would walk a little slower, a little more deliberate, knowing he was watching. That was the winter she went home with him. Their relationship progressed quickly, but Will thought it felt incredibly natural.

One night, they were lying in his bed. It was well after midnight. Their limbs were entangled under a blanket, absorbing each other's heat as they hid from the frost of a January night in D.C.

"Leesh, this is really good."

"What we just did or on a more macro scale?" She traced figure eights on his chest.

He laughed. "Well, I meant us together but what we just did was pretty good too."

She sighed and closed her eyes. "I agree."

"I…I…I love you," he whispered but when he looked down, he realized she was asleep. Maybe it was fate intervening there, stopping him from getting in too deep.

They continued being each other's study partners, midnight taco runners, and dawn coffee providers for the rest of the year. It never got too serious though Will knew Alicia was the marrying kind. He never told her but he wanted to marry her then. He would've dropped everything for that. He never told her because he didn't want to scare her. What they had was so good, he was afraid of messing it up. That fear is what drove them apart.

Alicia met Peter Florrick at an internship she had at a law firm. He was older, good looking, stable and from a good family. He was everything she should have wanted in a man.

Will saw their friendship grow. He watched Alicia pull away from him and towards Peter. He wanted to stop her. He should've stopped her but he didn't know how. He couldn't compete with Peter. He wanted the best for her, even if it meant she was not with him. It killed him. If you asked him now, he'd tell you the pain of watching the love of your life move on to someone else was more excruciating than a million gunshot wounds. They stopped studying together as often. Alicia always seemed to have somewhere to be.

One night he confronted her. "Alicia, what's going on with you? You never want to spend time together anymore and when we do, it's for 30 minutes and then you have some ludicrous reason why you have to leave."

Alicia looked at him somberly. "I don't think we should do this anymore."

"What the fuck does that mean?"

"Will—I need to focus on school right now. I'm losing myself and my goals in us and I can't do it anymore." Her eyes filled with tears.

"Why? Why can't you have both? We're working towards the same goal, if you don't recall."

"I just can't." She picked up her things and walked towards the door.

"Are you screwing him?" Will shouted after her.

She turned and looked at him with such disgust that it burned him deep down. He regretted saying it the second the words passed his lips. He was angry but that didn't give him the right to be hateful.

Alicia shook her head and walked out the door and out of his life.

They still had classes together but Will arrived late, taking a seat in the last row and leaving as soon as the professor stopped talking. He studied with a different group of friends, avoiding seeing her in the library. He found a new coffee shop and a new bar to hang out in.

Eventually, he heard through the grapevine that Alicia and Peter were together and would probably be engaged soon. He broke a few knuckles that night after 6 too many glasses of scotch and a drunken walk through the park resulted in an encounter with his fist and a one hundred year old oak tree.

The day they got married, Will went for a run hoping to turn off his mind. However, he soon realized that would be impossible and he heaved into a garbage can along the road. That night, he had fitful bouts of sleep. He dreamt of running right into the church and declaring his love for her. He woke up angry. He was angry because he didn't run after her when she left the first time and he was angry that he didn't run into the church. He made a vow to himself. He vowed he would get her back, even if it took 20 years.

His mind then wandered to that night 4 years ago; the night he left the voicemail for Alicia as she attended a press conference with Peter. The words he said echoed in his mind. _My plan is 'I love you.'_ Love, it had never gotten him anything but hurt and still he was hung up on his college sweetheart.

Will had a dream that night. It was not unlike one he had 20 years prior. He was running down a street in D.C. He looked up and realized he was at a church. He walked up to the doors and threw them open to see Alicia waiting at the altar, alone. Peter was nowhere to be found. Will had finally gotten his chance. "Marry me," he said as he walked toward her.

"What do you think I'm standing here for?"

/

Will woke up in a hospital gown. The IV in his arm was terribly uncomfortable and the light in the room gave him a headache. He groaned and felt the pain in his chest. He was quickly reminded why he was where he was. He lifted his head and tried to look around the room. There were two people sleeping in there but his vision was under a sedative cloud and he couldn't make out who it was. A striking realization hit him. One of those people was Alicia. He had her back. It wasn't just a dream. He vaguely remembered asking her to marry him. Was that part of the dream too?

As he moved around, the people woke up. As they moved closer, he realized it was his sister and Alicia.

He heard Sophie say, "Hey, big brother. How are you feeling now?"

He looked at Alicia and smiled. "I'm great." He extended his hand toward Alicia and she moved promptly to take it. "Did I propose?"

Alicia answered, "Yes…"

"And what did you say?"

"I didn't say anything because you're high as a kite right now, Will."

"Leesh—I'll swear on a bible or the constitution or that Cosmopolitan magazine over there, that I am fully aware and in control of my body and my words right now."

"Will, you've had a traumatic experience. Can we talk about this when you're out of the ICU?"

"Promise me you'll think about it though."

"I promise," she said as she squeezed his hand.

Sophie stood up, trying to avoid interrupting their moment. "Will, I have to go get Mom from the airport and get Bea to her dad. I'll be back in a little bit. Let me know if you need anything."

She hurried out of the room but she heard him respond as she walked down the hallway. "Bring a ring!" He shouted.


	8. look what you have done

Thanks for reviewing and being kind even when I'm terrible at updating. I have a tendency of starting chapters and then not finishing them for days, as was the case here.

I do not own TGW.

* * *

Sophie picked Bea up from Alicia's where she had stayed the night with Grace. Grace opened the door and Bea bounced out.

"Hi, Mommy!"

Sophie scooped up her daughter and hugged her tightly. After the night she'd had with Will, Sophie never wanted to let her go. Thinking about losing her was something Sophie could not do. "Hi, baby girl. I missed you! Did you have fun?"

"Mommy, put me down, please. I'm too old for you to hold me."

Sophie and Grace laughed as Sophie set Bea down. Sophie said, "Bea, go get your things. We're going to go." Bea skipped into the living room.

"Grace, thank you so much. I owe you big time. We have to go get manicures or something."

Grace's eyes widened. Her concerned, solemn demeanor reminded Sophie of Alicia in that moment. Grace said, "Please. Don't worry about it. Is Will okay? I saw some stuff on the news and my mom told me what happened but I didn't want to say anything in front of Bea. I've been praying for him."

"He's okay. It's going to be a while before he's running a marathon but I think we're out of the woods now. Thank you for your prayers. I know your mom's not big on that stuff but it means a lot to me. It's comforting just knowing someone is wishing well for you and your family. I really appreciate everything you've done, Grace. I don't know what I would've done without you."

They hugged and Grace whispered, "Sophie, really, it was the least I could do in the situation and we had fun."

The girls pulled apart as Bea came back into the foyer holding her owl backpack and her pony from Will.

"Ready to go?"

"Yep. Bye Grace. See ya later!"

"Bye Grace. Thanks again."

Grace waved goodbye from the door as Sophie and Bea got into the elevator.

Sophie led Bea to the car and then got her situated in her car seat. They headed back to Will's apartment so Sophie could get some things together for both Will and Bea. Bea's dad would be there to pick her up in a couple of hours.

"Mommy, why are you packing my suitcase? I'm not going with Daddy for three more days."

"Well, Baby Bea, Uncle Will is sick and he's in the hospital and I need to take care of him so Daddy said he would come get you early. Isn't that exciting?"

"I want to see Uncle Will."

"I don't know if that's a good idea."

"Mom, he is my best friend and he always helps me when I don't feel good and I need to help him."

"Bea, Daddy will be here in a little bit."

"Well then, we better go fast."

Sophie threw Bea's travel bag together and took a quick shower. She gathered some of Will's things as well and they threw it all in the car and headed to the hospital. Sophie couldn't argue with Bea about this. She knew Bea would never leave with her Dad if she didn't see Will.

As they entered the hospital, Sophie took Bea's hand. She told her, "Bea, when we get in there, you have to be gentle. You don't want to hurt Uncle Will. Be quiet, too."

Bea held her head high and nodded. She entered Will's room with a level of calm and concern that may have been unusual for other children her age.

Will was sleeping but awoke with the motion in the room. "Hey, Honey Bea," he said weakly.

"Hi, Uncle Will. Are you okay? What happened?"

"Well, a bad guy tried to hurt me but you know I'm too strong for that to happen. He tried but he couldn't get me."

"That's good." Bea climbed up onto the bed next to Will carefully. She lay next to him and stroked his arm, like he and her mother did when she was sick.

Sophie stood at the door, an observer to the remarkable relationship between her brother and her daughter. Finally she spoke, "Will, is she alright for a minute? I have to make a phone call."

Will looked up and shooed her out of the room with his hand.

Sophie stepped out into the courtyard of the hospital and pulled out her cell phone. 2 missed calls from her mother and a text from Adam telling her he'd made into town. She ignored her mother for the time being, knowing she was on an airplane and knowing she'd get more than an earful when her mother arrived. She called Adam, preferring the speed of talking over texting. Sophie told him she was at the hospital with Will and Bea was with her. Adam said he'd come pick her up from the hospital. He was going to stay the night in Chicago before flying back to Baltimore with Bea. Their phone call was civil but not intimate, polite but not friendly. It used to break Sophie's heart to have these conversations but after the events of yesterday, she'd realized that life was too short to hold onto bitterness and resentment and it wasn't healthy for her or for Bea to be angry anymore.

About an hour later, Adam picked Bea up. It wasn't the first time Sophie had to let her go but it was certainly the hardest. However, she knew it was the right thing for everyone to do. Bea could spend some time with her dad and Sophie could focus on Will.

/

After Bea left, Sophie left the hospital as well. She headed toward the airport to pick up their mother. Their relationship was an interesting one. Sophie had always been closer to her father and since his death it was hard for her to maintain the relationship with her mother. She called on birthdays and anniversaries and they spent the big holidays together for Bea's sake. Her mother did not approve of Sophie's life choices: her career, her marriage, her divorce, or her move to Chicago. Sophie learned a long time ago not to be upset by it. As the only son, Will was the apple of their mother's eye. He could do no wrong. Sophie learned to not be upset by that either.

Inside the airport, Sophie fidgeted and adjusted her clothes a million times waiting for her mother's flight to arrive. She was engrossed in a mindless Facebook game on her phone when she heard someone call her name. Looking up, she saw her mother, in all her glory, walking toward her.

"Mom, hi." Sophie took a bag from her mother's hand and gave her a brief hug.

"Sophie, you look tired."

"Well, I spent the night at the hospital…"

Her mother hugged her again. How strange, Sophie thought. Then her mother said, "Let's get there. I need to see William."

They loaded her things into Will's car and drove toward the hospital. The drive was much less tense than Sophie anticipated. They made small talk about the city and about the things Sophie had missed at home since she'd been gone. Her mother informed her of who was getting married, who was getting divorced, who caused the divorce. Sophie half listened. That world seemed a million miles—and years—away.

They arrived at the hospital and their mother practically leapt out of the car. Sophie parked and met her at the front door to guide her to Will's room. It had only been a day and Sophie knew the route like the back of her hand.

When they entered the room, Will was talking to Alicia who was seated next to him.

"Will…" their mother cried as she ran to him.

"Hey, Mom. You remember Alicia, right?"

"Alicia, you remember my mom, Lucy?"

Alicia extended her hand. "Hello, how have you been?"

"Oh, don't worry about me. I'm just worried about my baby."

Alicia shot Sophie a look and mouthed 'baby?' to her. Sophie chuckled from the other side of the room. Will never let go of Alicia's hand even when hugging his mother. He'd lost her twice now and he knew he couldn't take another loss.

After ensuring that he was really okay, Lucy relaxed and took the seat on the side of the bed opposite Alicia. Sophie sat in a recliner near the foot of the bed.

Lucy turned her attention to Alicia and said, "So, are you two together?"

Will squeezed Alicia's hand but let her field the question. "Yes, we are." She didn't elaborate.

"Are you still married? What does he think about this?"

Alicia took a breath. She knew this question was coming. "Yes, technically I am still married. However, we have not been 'together' in a very long time and frankly, I don't care what he thinks at this point."

Lucy conceded, not wanting to upset Will.

"Mom, what have you been up to? How's your tennis game?" Will provided the buffer and changed the subject.

"Oh, William, I haven't played tennis in such a long time. It's terrible, really. I miss it but I haven't been able to find a good partner since your father."

"That's too bad. I'd offer to play but I'm afraid I'm probably out of commission for a while."

"Don't even think about tennis right now."

Will was still on a heavy prescription of pain medications which made him drowsy. Whenever there was a lull in conversation, he seemed to fall asleep. The ladies tried not to wake him.

"Where's Bea?" Lucy whispered to her daughter.

"She's with Adam. He was supposed to take her anyway this weekend and he came a few days early when he heard about what happened."

"Alicia, don't you have children too? What are they doing?"

"They're 16 and 18. Zach is on his way to college and Grace is staying with her grandmother for the night."

"What do they think about all of this?"

Alicia maintained her composure and Sophie was terribly impressed. "Well, they're old enough to understand that things don't always work out between people no matter how badly they want it to and I think they just want me to be happy. Grace likes Will a lot and she's also developed a relationship with Bea that's pretty great."

Sophie added, "Yeah, Grace was a lifesaver yesterday. She kept Bea all day and night. Bea is slightly obsessed with her."

Lucy stated, "I'd like to meet them if you and Will are going to maintain this relationship."

Alicia said, "I'm sure Grace will be around sometime this weekend but Zach won't be home until Thanksgiving."

"Then I guess I'll just have to meet Grace now and Zach later."

Sophie stood up and announced that she was going to the cafeteria to get some coffee. Alicia volunteered to go with her. Sophie was not surprised. Her mother could be a bit much sometimes. They asked if Lucy wanted anything. She declined and said she was going to take a short nap.

They left the room quickly. As they got out of earshot of Lucy, Sophie said, "Sorry about her. She tends to judge now and then change her mind later."

Alicia smiled. "I'm not concerned. Peter's mother is ten times worse."

"Whoa—I'm sorry." Sophie laughed.

Sophie grabbed two coffees and Alicia picked out some snacks. They sat at a table in the empty cafeteria near the TV. Neither of them wanted to watch the news in the past 24 hours but now that Will was doing better, they felt safe to watch. They knew the story was still hot and would be all over but none of that mattered as long as Will was okay.

Sophie found a remote and turned up the volume. Like they guessed, the newscaster was talking about the shooting. Then a new headline popped up. "Governor's wife spends night at hospital with lawyer after courthouse shooting."

They looked at each other. Alicia's mouth dropped open. Sophie said, "Shit."

Alicia's phone started going off incessantly. "Shit."


End file.
